


Mystery of the Pants

by XMadamRoseX



Series: The Mysteries of the Disappearing Clothing and Morals [2]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Drinking, Drunk Sex, F/M, Mila is a bro, Poor Life Choices, Teen Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-20
Updated: 2017-08-20
Packaged: 2018-12-17 20:06:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11858739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/XMadamRoseX/pseuds/XMadamRoseX
Summary: Yuri's had a bad week. Mila's solution is liquor.AKAYuri + Mila + Alcohol = Poor life choices.





	Mystery of the Pants

**Author's Note:**

> PART 3! This is the one that actually started it all for me. I wrote this one a while ago and have been waiting to post it. I HC Mila as the ultimate friend that will do her duty and get you drunk!

Yuri and Mila were on the ice near the end of practice; Yuri was doing figures while Mila was practicing some slow spinning. They both finally came to a stop as they looked up at the happy newlyweds as they skated holding hands around the rink. “Ugh.” Groaned Yuri as he skated over to Mila. “So, we have a half day tomorrow.”

“I know, and you said you'd go to a new club with me.” Said Mila smiling, thinking of the bet she had won last week.

Yuri grumbled. “Yea… Yea… I said you couldn’t lift me after my growth spurt.”

Mila gave a small giggle “I really didn't think you could scream like that loud.”

“I didn’t expect you to do it on the ice! In front of everyone.” Yuri nearly screeched.

Mila laughed again "You did kinda look funny like that, but anyway you'll have fun; we always do."

"Yeah" said Yuri with a smile as he skated to the edge of the rink and to the exit.

'I'll wear one of the new outfits I got the last time we went shopping." said Mila thinking out loud as she unlaced her skates.

Yuri smiled " Oh... is it cute? I don't want every guy in the club after you... again" He looked back at his skates as he cleaned the ice off the blades before storing them in their bag.

Mila smiled sweetly "Of course it’s cute silly, I'm always cute." She finished putting on her shoes and bounced up to her feet.

…..

Mila walked down the hall to Yuri’s bedroom in Victor and Yuri’s new house. He had moved in in the off season for a few weeks and had never left. Now Victor wouldn’t hear about him leaving.

She knocked before she swung the door open and nearly fell over. Yuri was dressed in a pair of shorts and fishnets under. His black tank top hung off him loosely. “Woah Yuri! You said we’d have to worry about the boys with me. Now I have to worry about boys and girls from you.”

Yuri grinned. “I need a distraction. Otabek posted a picture of his new girlfriend… she’s blonde.”

Mila frowned. “I honestly don’t get him. He keeps dating people that look like you and has kissed you… but he’s not gay? Or even Bi?”

Yuri shrugged. “He’s… confused? I don’t think he’s family is okay with it. But tonight, I’m getting drunk and plan to make poor life choices. You in?”

Mila smiled and pulled Yuri close to her. “When am I ever not in for poor life choices?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Five hours and a whole lot of Drinks later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Yuri, sweetie maybe you should slow down" Mila watched Yuri down his 4th tequila shot in one hour. She looked at the line of empty shot glasses and drinks in front of her also.

Yuri slung his head around to meet Mila’s eyes " Maybe YOU should slow down, I'm just ~ _hiccup_ ~ fine."

Mila glared "Well I think ~ _hiccup~_ you're kinda tipsy" Yuri was swaying… or was that her.

Yuri straightened himself up and spoke slowly "I ~ _hiccup_ ~ am not ~ _hiccup~_  not tipsy" that said he leaned back and right off the back of his chair, hitting the floor.

Mila broke out laughing "Oh really, well you just tipped!" she stumbled to his feet, and helped Yuri to his feet.

Together, leaning on each other they made it outside and managed to tell the confused Taxi Driver Victor and Yuuri’s address. In what can only be called the best luck on the planet, they made it not only into the apartment with no noise but into Yuri’s bedroom.

Yuri looked at Mila, a wicked grin dancing on his lips. Mila smiled, “Yes, blurry Yuri.” She giggled, “That sounded funny.”

Yuri’s smiled grew even more as he grabbed Mila’s face and kissed her softly. Mila looked at Yuri his eyes wide "Yuri! What are you doing?!" Yuri’s only response was to kiss her again and giggle. Mila giggled some and pulled back "Yuri... do you know who you just kissed?"

Yuri smiled again "Yes I do... now Shut Up!" He pushed his lips back to her and placed his hand on her butt.

Mila returned the kiss with a soft moan as she pushed them towards his bed "Ok just making sure." She mumbled into the kiss as they fell on the bed.

**-Morning-**

Yuri rolled over and hit something solid. He sat up quickly and looked down to the mop of red hair that was smashed face first into his pillow. His eyes wide as he took in the naked body in his bed. He was about to panic when the events from the night before flooded into his head. He groaned and fell back on his pillow, just as Mila popped her head up and looked at him.

"Yuri!! What are you doing-she froze as she blinked a few time. “Oh…shit.” She smiled weakly at Yuri. “That was not what I had planned.”

Yuri laughed "You think I planned that?! When you said good time I thought dancing, maybe drinking, but not...that!"

Mila laughed too, and looked around his room "WHAT DID WE DO TO YOUR ROOM!?" Yuri looked around. His desk was cleared of all its belongings, half the bedding was on the floor and his boxers were hanging off the top of his bathroom door.

Yuri laughed again “Something also not planned…” He fell back on the bed and sighed.

Mila glared "haha funny, we should get dressed. We have to be at the arena by 1." She got up and started gathering her clothes. “Hey Yuri? What happen to my pants?”

Yuri was pulling on his workout clothes and looked around. “Um… I think I remember you throwing them in the hall. Something about ‘Never needing them again’.”

Mila chuckled “Oh yea…” He walked over to the door and peaked out. “Um. Yuri. They are not here.”

Yuri snickered "Uh-oh" That’s not good. Maybe Makka grabbed them. He’s always taking my socks.

Mila groaned. “Well great I have no pants. Give me a pair of your sweats. I have some clothes at the rink I can change into. We’re gonna be late if we don’t get a move on it.”

**-Some Time Later-**

Mila and Yuri walked into the training center and headed to the locker rooms. Once they were both dressed they headed to the rink. Both looked like hell and knew that they wouldn’t be doing much that day. Yuri was leaning on Mila slightly. “Are we going to talk about last night?”

Mila sighed. “Do we have to? Honestly I’m shocked it took this long.”

Yuri stood back up straight and laughed. “Yea… I did say bad life choices… boy did you deliver.”

Mila slapped his shoulder as they walked into the ice rink. “Shut up. If I remember correctly –“

They were cut off by Victor calling them. Yuuri was by his side with a pair of black skinny jeans in his hands. Mila froze “Oh… Shit…. Yuri!”

Yuri snorted and dropped his head.

Yuuri walked over and smiled. “I don’t think Yuri has been able to fit into this for a while. And I don’t think he could have made all that noise on his own last night.” He handed her his pants and walked back to his husband.

Yuri had laid down on a bench and was laughing. Mila was glaring at him. “Yuri… so help me…”

Yuri looked up. “Found your pants!”

**Author's Note:**

> There you go! Let me know what you think below and feel free to share this with your friends!
> 
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